Valentine’s Day is one of those observances that seems to look different from age group to age group. Preschool and elementary school children, for example, decorate bags or boxes and everyone exchanges a valentine with every classmate. Their valentines are most often little foldable cards, single-serving candy, or clever combinations to make it easy on parents. In fact, much like at Halloween, individually wrapped Valentine’s Day candy is easy to find with themes depicting everything from love and friendship to all things Star Wars and Disney. Maybe even Baby Shark, if the fad hasn’t yet fizzled.
Kids in middle school and high school might prefer to completely ignore the awkwardness of Valentine’s Day, while young adults agonize over the perfect gift to express their affection for the special person whom they’ve now dated for a solid three weeks.
Engaged couples, newlyweds, and the pre-children population are typically working and able to spend part of a paycheck on gifts, dinner out, or a weekend away to celebrate each other and their relationship.
Then there are busy parents, single people, empty-nesters, people with no children, retirees, and so forth.
If you have even one friend, colleague, neighbor, or relative, then you have just as much to celebrate on Valentine’s Day. And you can express kindness, affection, devotion, gratitude, and similar loving sentiments without dinner reservations, a dozen roses, or the perfect card.
Here are 20 little ways to say “I love you,” “I care about you,” or “I’m thinking of you,” on Valentine’s Day, or any other day. Get creative and adapt them for children of all ages; a spouse, partner, or significant other; a neighbor or friend; and even siblings or parents.
1 Slip a note into a lunchbox, bookbag, or pocket, between the pages of a book, etc. where someone special is sure to find it. Write something meaningful or simply draw a heart or smiley face. When my daughter started her senior year of high school, we wrote congratulatory messages on cardstock and put them in her car.
2 Leave stickie notes with words of affection or inspiration on mirrors, in cupboards or drawers, taped to the milk carton or a cereal box, and in other places around the house or your workplace.
3 Place a Hershey’s kiss or other little chocolate treat on the pillows of the ones you love.
4 Surprise someone with a batch of cookies, a basket of silk flowers you arranged yourself, or some other handmade treat.
5 Make your kids’ beds for them. Older children especially may appreciate this. It’s nice to pull back the covers of a neatly made bed, but making the bed is often a task no one has time for on busy mornings.
6 Text a compliment, a silly GIF, or just a single heart emoji to someone you care about.
7 Make a playlist of favorite or meaningful songs and share it with someone special.
8 While your family members are in the shower, surprise them with towels that have been heated in the dryer.
9 Buy one small bunch of flowers from any store, cut the stems apart, and put one or two stems in juice glasses with a bit of water. Place one glass in each bedroom or at every place setting at the table. Use plastic cups instead of juice glasses and deliver some to a friend or neighbor’s front door.
10 Wait up for someone who is due to come home late. Perhaps your spouse is working late or returning from a trip, or maybe you have an older child who is out with friends or studying with a classmate. If staying up isn’t practical, leave an outside light on as well as a light in the entryway or kitchen, along with a note that says you hope they had a nice evening out and sleep well.
11 Accompany your significant other to do something you know they will enjoy, regardless of your own thoughts or feelings about the activity. Go with them to the gym, or on a bike ride, or just take a walk together. Rent the movie they’ve been wanting to see. Get takeout from their favorite restaurant. Visit the museum exhibition they’ve been talking about.
12 Fold a sheet of cardstock or printer paper into a card and write “I love you” in different languages. Use an online translation tool to find as many languages as you can. Give the card to someone special.
13 Give your children the night off from doing chores or take over a task that someone you know has been dreading or hasn’t had time to do themselves. Maybe it’s taking an older friend or neighbor to renew their driver’s license, helping a sibling clean out a closet, or washing your spouse’s car.
14 Surprise someone by fixing their favorite morning glass of juice, or cup of coffee or tea. For a colleague or friend, grab an extra cup for them on your way to work or school.
15 Without being asked, offer to pick up dinner for your family. This will be most welcome on a busy day when family members with various commitments are going in different directions. Treat a friend or neighbor to the same offer if you know that they’re experiencing a difficult time or if things are more hectic than usual for them.
16 Surprise a family member with a full tank of gas in their car.
17 Before sitting in front of the television for the evening, spend a few minutes with your significant other or another family member and ask them about the high and low points of their day. Resist the urge to talk about your own day until they ask.
18 Put on music to start the day, or to listen to during dinner, or in place of watching television as your family winds down in the evening. Find some oldies that might be new to some family members or let the youngest or oldest in the family choose what you listen to.
19 Plan a surprise outing for someone special. I was once an accomplice in a surprise birthday gift for a friend I didn’t get to see very often. My friend’s husband made all of the arrangements for us. All I had to do was pick her up and enjoy lunch with her.
20 Reach for the hand of the one you love, at a moment when they might not expect it, especially if it’s a gesture you haven’t made in a long time.
Life is short and today’s world is filled with news and events that continually and repeatedly threaten to drag us down. If you are blessed to have people to love, and who love you in return, then tell them how much they mean to you. Show them how much you appreciate them. It doesn’t have to cost a thing. All it takes is some thought. As we enter into a new decade, imagine the impact we can have on the people in our lives—and the ripple effect that can occur—if each of us spends more time thinking of others than we do thinking of ourselves. The best news is that we don’t have to wait until Valentine’s Day to start, and we can continue long past February.
